Some years ago minimalism got my attention and interest. The main reason was that I moved from the Netherlands to Sweden and left everything I knew and owned behind except for some clothes, my husband and kids.
I felt sad not having my stuff around and I started exploring why. I realized stuff is just stuff and can be replaced anytime anywhere. When you start with less than you had, it creates space to rethink what you actually need to have to be happy.
Everything I own now is something I need or I have emotional feelings towards.
I live in a tiny house so I can’t own a lot of stuff and I changed my idea that owning a big house is the way to move forward.
Sometimes you say yes to new things and projects because you can. You’re on a roll and the thing on your mind is growth. Striving for a beautiful, better life and following your own ambition. And in my case that was growing my business. The thing is, when you actually start growing and succeeding in your pursue of whatever, nothing seems to fit anymore and you start to desperately keep all things up in the air trying to manage and fit your old you in your new situation. After a while you start to realize that they don’t go well together. So you have a choice, take a brave step into all the things you have been working for or wonder why you feel so tired and stay in your old habits and life. New things don’t fit in old ways.
It took me time and getting sick to realize this. Everything was going well for me for a while and in that time I took on so many new projects. Had my goals and all was working great. Super duper busy but do-able. But then private things happened (they seem to keep on happening hahaha, oh wait a minute, isn’t that called life?) and suddenly I needed to be in hyper speed mode all the time to keep on doing what I planned and signed for. And I was also able to do that. But of course those kind of situations are only things you can keep doing for a certain and short amount of time. When you find yourself in the middle of life asking you to drop things you love and like just because it’s too much on your plate it can tear you apart. I have been soooo angry and constantly screaming; why is this happening and how am I suppose to deal with life when it constantly seems to have a different plan?
And finally I got an answer; just because you want and can doesn’t mean you have to. If you take on new projects you have to ask yourself if you actually have space for it in your current life. Or you are still able to keep on doing it when in your private life things happen or change.
The beautiful thing is when you experience life and you work as a coach to help others you can really use your own life experiences next to your professionalism. In this way you are always the teacher and the student.
So, here is a list to tune into if you feel overwhelmed and tips on how to create space for yourself in the process.
- Do you really have space and time to focus on something new looking at your life in this moment?
- When taking on new things is there anything old you can let go?
- When you feel you don’t have “time” enough to take care of yourself, is there something else you can let go?
- Is more and being busy all the time really healthy?
- How does being busy and doing “important” stuff actually make you feel?
- When you make to do lists, are you ever done and are you able to put on even more to do things?
I decluttered a lot in my life and to be honest I felt forced to do that since my health became fragile being under pressure and emotional stress all the time.
I made clear on what and who needed attention and for whom I wanted to make time and space.
After seeing my weekly hour rapport on my phone I decided to cut down as much time on my phone as possible. By deleting a lot of apps and social media platforms (which was super scary to do) I got 3,5 hours per day of time! Time I want to spend on projects of my choosing, writing, being in nature and have conversations with my friends and family.
I decided not to buy anything new except when I need something. I cleaned out my house and closets and it feels amazingly free.
I accepted finally my introvert-ness and my need to recharge alone by just doing absolutely nothing. I never want to give this up again because I actually am a better human if I live like this. So if I have a new project I like but I have to give up my me-time I wont take the project on.
I am slowly accepting that living in my own truth sometimes pisses people off and that that is ok. I accept that my feelings and coming forward with my feelings is ok even if others think it’s not.
I am accepting that having great ideas does NOT mean I have time to execute those ideas and the world will not explode if I don’t take it “all” on.
I am slowly learning that for every problem there’s a solution, but that I don’t have to be that solution.
Working for a new stage in life or creating a new situation can only succeed when you make room for it to happen.
A work in progress but with love,